Today was LONG...too LONG!

[tiffanieh]

I got a late start (9:00am), add to that a younger boy with a less than stellar attitude and need of constant correction (lord, will this ever get better!? PLEASE!), along with allowing him an hour break to play with legos and de-stress time. Delaying school for him is NEVER a good thing. He just does NOT do well with a prolonged school day. Everything gets over dramatized, melt downs and "I can't do this" just increases!

Bless my older boys heart, but even his day got severely delayed by my constant need to direct the younger brother so much.

We didn't wrap up our day until 4:00pm!!!!

I told my oldest son (who is soooooo easy to homeschool) that for the sake of everyone's sanity, I really need to work hard on his brother's schoolwork that requires my attention first thing in the morning, getting the majority of his schoolwork done before lunch. He is doing Bigger, so that shouldn't be a problem if I don't flip-flop too much between both guides. I told my oldest (who is doing Preparing) to do every single little thing possible that he could do on his own independently in the morning, then we'd have all the one on one time we needed together once his brother is off playing by himself, happy that school is behind him.

What do you think? Is this good advise?

[lissiejo]

I'm sorry the day was rough! Your youngest sounds like my oldest. Maybe it's the age? She's 2nd grade and will turn 7 soon. She's in Bigger as well.

Your new plan sounds great! I read a blog somewhere, wish I could find the post and link it here, that said to plan for the youngest student, or most needy, first. In our case my smallest who starts Little Hands this week, is first up. I set out independent or minimal instruction from me stuff for my older two who are in Little Hearts and Bigger. That includes things link handwriting or Thinking Skills or math if it isn't a new concept. Then when she's done my oldest keeps on doing what she can on her own like literature or Bible memory (I do the questions with her later) while my middle girl is working with me on stuff she needs the undivided-attention-me for like history, science, or phonics. Then my oldest daughter gets me. Sometimes we wait until during the younger girls' nap to finish up the history or science, but we are often finished before then. We're also going half speed, probably for all of the next two years so she's not overwhelmed with the amount of work in Bigger.

Anyway, all that to say your plan make sense Especially since you do have an older one who can do more on his own.

Melissa

[tiffanieh]

Thanks Melissa for the cheer and vote of confidence! My youngest son is 8, almost 9 (next month). He has ALWAYS been my stronged willed, VERY active child. He CAN.NOT.SIT.STILL for more than 20 seconds unless he's in a seat at the table. Storytime, Bible, History readings are acrobatic feats in disguise. He moves from side to side, flips over, moves across the room...it drives me batty!

Part of me thinks this is the beauty of homeschooling, that his busy-bodiness wouldn't have this release if he were in school full time. But the other part of me wants to SCREAM that he can't sit still like his older brother and listen...just sit still already!!!

[Carrie]

Tiffanie,

I'm so sorry that your day went long! We definitely don't want this to be the way your year goes, although I know all of us do have long days and long weeks sometimes as part of homeschooling.

In pondering your situation, to me outside of the fact that you have a distractible, wiggler (which will always extend any program ), I also notice that you're doing Bigger and Preparing. This in itself is going to make for a lengthy school day each day for you, because we don't really intend for families to do both Bigger and Preparing at the same time.

There are always exceptions to this case though, so if you're thinking that your placement is right skill-wise for your kiddos (and your older son has already done Bigger), then I would ponder doing Bigger at half-speed for a chunk of this year. This would allow your wiggler to ease into the Bigger guide and do well with it, while still giving you time to devote to your oldest son who will still need quite a bit of time with you for the needed training in Preparing as well.

I honestly would not advise doing full-speed Bigger and full-speed Preparing at the same time otherwise. I'll paste a post below about the way we did half-speed Bigger at our house with my third little guy. You wouldn't have to do it this way, but this gives you one option.

I'd love to have you post back just to be sure that your placement is right. Then, we'll be glad to help in any other way we can!

Previous post of mine below:
We're doing Bigger Hearts at 1/2 speed right now. I'll type below how we're doing it, but remember there are many ways to do this and so you wouldn't need to do it like this. We alternate Schedule 1 and Schedule 2 and do the basics daily as shown below.

Daily:
Copywork of poem for the unit (approx. 2 lines/day for 10 days before moving on to the next poem in the next unit) (10 min.)
Math Box (We have a different tab in the guide to mark his spot in math each day and just move that tab daily) (15 min.)
Language Arts Box (We do the grammar lesson one day (schedule 1) and practice the spelling words the next day (schedule 2). (15 min.) Sometimes there isn't any spelling scheduled in the Language Arts Box, but we just do it anyway using the words for the unit and writing them on a markerboard. This way we can stay on the same page for grammar/spelling as the rest of the daily plans, so when we do move to full-speed Bigger Haerts, I won't have a separate tab for Language Arts too.
Emerging Reader Set (in Appendix) (15 min.)

Schedule 1:
Reading About History Box (10 min.)
Bible Study Box (10 min.)
Poetry Box (5-8 min.)
Bottom Left Rotating Activity Box (15-20 min.)

Schedule 2:
Corresponding Music Box (5-10 min.)
Storytime Box (15 min.)
Science Box (20-25 min.)

That's it!

Blessings,
Carrie

Blessings,
Carrie

[tiffanieh]

Carrie,

Thank you so much for taking the time to personally read and respond to my post. A brief background...the boys have always been together (we did LHFHG and BLHFHG and then the first 6 units of BHFHG) until 1 1/2 years ago when my youngest went to school in January. Really long story, but the oldest and I continued to homeschool, but without Ashton at home it just didn't feel the same doing HOD without him (not really sure WHERE that mentality was coming from) but anyhoo we dropped HOD and we did other things.

Fast forward to this year, everyone is back at home, and I knew we had to return to HOD. However, Ethan (my 5th grader) was certainly ready for PHFHG, possibly could have done CTC, but since we hadn't done Preparing I thought we should just start there and do CTC next year. Ashton, my almost 9 year old, could verbally do PHFHG, but I knew there was no way that he would/could do it as written. He does NOT like to do much writing at all. The writing required in Bigger is sometimes a frustration for him.

Yesterday I did ask the boys for the sake of my sanity, and two in depth guides that we are doing, to see about combining again, and Ethan definitely liked having his own guide now, and Ashton didn't have much to say other than he didn't want the workload of what Preparing required.

I'm so confused. Should I have put Ethan in at CTC where he would be so much more independent? Should I just go half speed with Bigger for Ashton, although he really could birthday wise be a 4th grader? Ashton is a VERY smart child, but he's also lazy when it comes to doing hard work in school. Ethan is my pleaser, overachiever and really enjoys our school day. He's really enjoying Grandpa's Box and I am enjoying our conversations.

Thank you for your help Carrie. I hope to hear from you soon!

[lissiejo]

I'm not sure if this helps...but...

A very wise woman told me that perfectionism can lead to apparent laziness. Maybe your son isn't a perfectionist, but my oldest daughter is. When she feels like she might even get the tiniest thing wrong she has the tendency to shut down, but do it in such a way that she just looks lazy. I KNOW she can do the work well, but SHE doesn't have the confidence. She starts whining about it being too hard when she has just finished something harder. She complains that she's bored, when 5 minutes ago she was eager to begin the project. She just stares off into space or intentionally tries to divert my attention to a new subject.

Perfectionism is one reason we started homeschooling because she couldn't handle missing anything in school. I have worked so hard this past year to help her see that, yes, she should work her hardest, but perfection isn't a requirement. That may not be where your son is, but what you wrote seemed to echo my daughter on so many levels! I have to fight the urge not to assume she's being lazy and help her work through those tendencies because I know God will use that in her one day if we can get past the inferiority it can cause her to feel!

[tiffanieh]

Hi Melissa,

I hear what you are saying, and I can agree that my older son actually has more of a perfectionism streak in him. My younger son, the one in question, I can honestly say that I really don't think that is it. He simply doesn't WANT to do any writing. He hates the physical act of it, wants to take the shortest route possible, etc. I've held him back a year honestly due to this issue, thinking giving him another year of grace would allow his body to mature before requiring more and more from him.

he could technically be a 4th grader, but we actually had him repeat 2nd grade simply because I knew moving onward he would NOT tolerate higher level requirements. I'm walking a fine line right now with getting him to "man up" so to speak, on more work. he's doing "3rd grade" right now and I honestly don't feel like the work is too much for him, but he doesn't quite see it that way yet! LOL

[Carrie]

Tiffanie,

The ladies are doing a terrific job of helping you talk through possible options, pitfalls, and concerns. I am so grateful for this board and for the ladies' willingness to help! What a blessing!

Thanks so much for sharing a bit more about your kiddos. It does sound like you have them well-placed. With this in mind, I would definitely consider doing your younger son at half-speed in Bigger for awhile. I'm thinking 4 1/2 months or so and then re-evaluate. I wouldn't look at going to half-speed as a reward for any type of laziness, but rather as a way to train your son to do his work well. I would expect the time it takes him to complete his work to be longer if he has a dislike for writing. It can be that the physical act of writing is tough for him and fatigues him right now. This happens fairly often with younger kiddos and especially with boys. Their hands just aren't as pliable as girls' hands and fine motor skills come less easily to boys than girls. The fingers need to become more bendable and the fine motor muscles have to be built up. If you think about it, in history, men's hands have often been better suited to gripping a sword than to fine-work like needlepoint. Alfred the Great never did learn to write well even though he supposedly slept with a slate under his pillow at night to try to learn. His fingers were not nimble enough because he never learned to write when he was young and years of gripping a sword had stiffened his fingers!

So, think of this time as a training time for requiring better quality work and for strengthening muscles and fine motor skills needed to write. You'll also feel less rushed in your day, which will make you more able to really enjoy your time with your younger son and more able to stop and focus on needed issues as they arise without feeling like you're getting behind. It's so important to allow your younger son to have a positive transition to coming back home and to give him a period of settling in. At the mid-way point through your year, if your son is ready for more in Bigger then add more. If he seems happy where he is, you can go a month or two more at half-speed, ramping up in the final couple of months of the year to full-speed. For sure by next year, plan to be at full-speed in Bigger.

Remember that in any half-speed plan, you need your son to be doing copywork, math, and reading daily. You can alternate grammar and spelling (as on a half-speed schedule) or do them as scheduled in the guide in a daily fashion instead. With this plan, your son won't get behind in the 3R's and will still have time to do a good job in the other areas without getting weary. With a half-speed schedule, you will need to do school 5 days a week though for Bigger (with Preparing at a 4 day week). Once you go to full-speed Bigger, you could consider doing Bigger 4 days a week too (and just carrying over the extra units left in Bigger to next year).

Think of Bigger as a very important training year that you don't want to rush through. However, when you feel the need to begin adding to Bigger, then it is a sure sign that you are ready to bump up to doing more of Bigger each day. We did slow down Bigger with my third little guy for 4 1/2 months, because he had some similar fine motor needs. It worked so well for him, and he really loved his school! He turned out much better than I had thought he could, simply because he was given enough time to do it well without feeling rushed. When we went to full-speed he was much more ready. He finished Bigger last year and headed into Preparing at full-speed before our summer break.

Blessings,
Carrie

[tiffanieh]

Thanks Carrie so much for coming back and responding! Today we did as you suggested. Ethan did Preparing as planned, and Ashton did Bigger at 1/2 speed (but copywork, grammar, and math daily) They are both also doing Latin and DITHOR.

Ashton was done by lunchtime and Ethan finished up at 1:30. We started around 8:00 (but their math lesson for today was actually VERY LONG. Took 45 minutes each!

We all seemed to do much better by finishing at 1:30 vs. 4:00! LOL

I told Ashton that we were going with a reduced Bigger schedule while he grows into it, and we would re-evaluate each month to see what we need to bump. We DO start a co-op on August 20th, so we will start having a 4 day week then, so I am hopeful by that time he will be ready to bump it back up to normal pace.